Mishaps & Musings 

Pithy thoughts and pensamientos from life's many missteps & meanderings, written and spoken

Traducción... cosas que aprendí siendo torpe

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February 28, 2018

Unlocking my root chakra, uniting science and spirituality, becoming Jason Bourne, and waiting for Godot in the bathroom line

February 12, 2018

Sassy yet classy 4th graders, sneaky sneaker heels, standing on Regina's left, and looking like shit. Hobbit habits die hard.

February 4, 2018

Fun fact - 50% of the time I’m mistaken for a woman on the phone. 96.7% if I’m speaking with someone from below the Mason-Dixon line. I'll be sharing my encounters with surprised and unintentionally aggressive pharmacy employees and elementary school children who were astounded that my voice was attached to my particular persona, as well as my overall journey to embrace my meditation tape-ready voice to eventually make this podcast.

Let's make some #mishapportunities!

#Mishapportunities aka Clumsy Wisdom:

On finding the sliver lining

I have an extremely singular and magical voice. With its ultrasonic, Nazgul-like tenor, it has the uncanny ability to irritate even the most empathetic of humans and strike fear into the hearts of dogs and other small land animals whose range of hearing is above our own. What’s more it means I never need to come out to anyone ever. I have to say spending so much time correcting people on my name, when it’s not 9am, it’s nice to have one thing I never have to e...

January 30, 2018

Overcoming body issues; exercising for world peace, escaping my spandex prison, getting the (vitamin) D, and farting freely.

January 21, 2018

All of the mishaps that originated from my name starting with Spell Check correcting my name to #mishap in the 90s, to Buenos Aires baristas confusing me with Mila Kunis, to my diminutive life from having a nickname for a name.

Let's make some #mishapportunities!

#Mishapportunities aka Clumsy Wisdom:

On autocorrect and ass

Autocorrect’s arrogant ass is always assuming you’re just wallowing in the sorrow of your misspelled shit. You know just continually praying for it to swoop in and save you with its grammatically correct and punctuated ass. Did I say ass enough? I have very strong feelings about autocorrect...and ass. #AutocorrectAndAss

On Spell Check

Spell Check is a little different. We already know she’s more like a puritanical New England yuppie. She’s also like those annoying red notifications on your phone for every app that you just want to disappear. So you click on them and then they go away. Put then they pop up again like 5 minutes later because someone in Silicon Valley felt th...

January 14, 2018

Hi I'm Misha Chakrabarti and welcome to Mishaps, spelled with a Misha. That's right I'm always a "P" away from some kind of misadventure and you know what? That's okay.And that’s pretty much what this podcast is about.

After spending way too many hours as a teenager wondering about the repercussions of messing up, I’m now in my mid-to-late twenties and know that #buffooneryIsInevitable.

As a foreigner mispronouncing literally everything in Buenos Aires now, a SUPER gay short and bronzed man growing up in the US, and an awkward and extroverted human on the loose in the wide world I’ve DEFINITELY learned more from falling flat on my face, laughing, and getting up again than I did from any textbook. And I spent 13 years as a gymnast so that happened a lot. I also eat a lot of bananas.

I ultimately decided to share my stories because one day I left a 16-minute long whatsapp message for a friend and was like “Sayyyyyy whaaaattttt!! Boy’s got verbiage!! That’s pretty much an episode of a podcas...

October 16, 2017

I take

  FOREVER

    To leave

      The house

Each time

  I'm almost

    Out the door

      I think

        'What if it rains?'

      I worry

        'Will my feet get wet?'

      I contemplate

        'Should I bring a coat?'

TOO MUCH

  Thinking

  Worrying

  Contemplation

Better to

  Charge out the door

    And later realize

      I forgot

        My umbrella

    Than later realize

      I forgot

        My sense of adventure

October 16, 2017

I

  HATE

    MOSQUITOS

The incessant itching

  The way they

    Desecrate

      My body

        With their bites

    & the annoying 

      Buzzing

        In my ear

One day

  I looked down

    & saw

      A mosquito

        Sucking

          On my Cephalic vein

            The

              BIG BLOODY VESSEL

                Highway of

                  My bicep

I wanted to

  SQUISH 

    THAT

      BITCH

& also thank her

   For reminding me

    Of my continuing 

      Vascularity

        That attracts

          Mosquitos

          & Men

            Buzzing in my ear

            Sucking on my body    

October 16, 2017

NOTHING

  IS

    AWKWARD

If

  You DON'T

    FEEL AWKWARD

October 16, 2017

I got in a CAB

  In Buenos Aires

    & paid a small fortune

    & rushed

      To my meeting

        To get there on time

& found

  Everyone

    IS ALWAYS

      RUNNING LATE

        In Latin America

I took

  The bus

    Home

~~~

Tome un taxi

  En Buenos Aires

    & page un monton

    & me apure

      Para llegar a la reunión

        A tiempo

& en fin

  Descubrí

    Que todo el mundo

      SIEMPRE ESTÁ

        ATRASADO

          En Latinoamérica

Regrese

  A casa

    En el bondi

October 16, 2017

En una fiesta

  En Argentina

    Pide

      Fernet y cola

        Porque

          Me gusta chupar

            Coca Cola

Después aprendí que

  Pide

    Fernet

      Y culo

Pero en fin

  También

    Me gusta chupar

      Esa cola

        Especial

          Producto de

            Argentina

October 16, 2017

Necessity

  Put me

    On a

      NO BULLSHIT

        Diet

And now I

  FEEL LIGHTER

    Without

      All the

        DEAD WEIGHT

          In my life

October 16, 2017


You

  ALWAYS

    Have

      OPTIONS…

You

  Might not

    ALWAYS

      LIKE

        Them though…

October 16, 2017

Last night

  I went home

    With a

      HOT DOUCHEBAG

And learned

  That nobody

    Is hot enough

      To be

        A DOUCHEBAG

October 16, 2017

My parents

  NEVER APPROVE

    Even when

      I do

        EXACTLY WHAT

          They want

So I

  STOPPED SEEKING

    THEIR APPROVAL

      &

        STARTED LIVING

          My life

            For me

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